I'm moving!

It was time to drop the 'drama'.  Head over and subscribe to my new site www.motivationrhonda.com for healthy tips, inspiration, and of course....MOTIVATION!!

Onward and upward! 

Quality over Quantity!

The Results!  My Ultimate Reset Review

Three weeks to form habits is the thing we hear all the time right?  Well, there is truth in it.  The Ultimate Reset taught me valuable lessons about my habits with food, my addictions and my self-image.

Is your food smiling back at you?

Week 2 Success!

My Actual Meals all prepared in my kitchen! (And I'm not a great cook!)

 

Testimonials from our Reset Accountability Group:

I'm done! Down 12lbs! Ordered some new jeans this morning, size 4 WOO HOO!!! Have not been here in years and it feels great!!! ~ Sandy R.

Start of day 14 ... I'm down 10 pounds. I haven't seen that number on a scale in almost 5 years. I decided I needed to measure. I've lost 2 inches in my waist, 2 1/4 inches in hips & 1 3/4 inches in my chest! ~ Misty F.

Getting rid of allergies, knowing I do have more self control than I realized, appreciation for food that is good for me, appreciation for planning, losing weight that I couldn't shake for years, and understanding that my choices ...were what had been holding me back all this time. When the plan was placed in front of me and I followed it, it worked. I feel great. Who knows how long I would have spun my wheels working out to get these results.~ Heather D.

I feel very good about being able to finish the three week reset. I started out at 246 pounds and I finished at 223 pounds. Add the 10 pounds I had already lost by drinking Shakeology and that is 33 pounds total...and I have not even stared working out yet. I was hoping this reset would give me a good start before beginning P90X, and it did. ~ Craig H.

It has taught me self control, discipline, that being good to yourself is the ultimate high. It is all about the mind, I am around all types of food and have not fallen into temptation. I have created a new habit! ~ Maria Z.
 
Caffeine habit. Kicked. Sugar Cravings. Gone. Feelings: Amazing. Awesome. ~Rhonda Layton

Week One Success

Hungry Anyone?
Here's a sampling of the delicious foods I've made during the first week of the Ultimate Reset.

 














Week 1: At a glance
Weight Loss: 3 pounds
Caffeine Habit: Kicked
Energy: High
Exercise: Tai Cheng and P90X2 yoga or complete rest
Mood:  VERY Happy
Overall:  I am thoroughly enjoying cooking these simple and absolutely delicious recipes.  I miss my hard workouts, but my body is thanking me for recovery.  I feel very light and very clean.  I love that I don't need to rely on my morning coffee addiction to start my day.  My cravings for chocolate and coffee are gone.

How to get started NOW!

The Ultimate Reset is simply amazing but I can only speak to my experience.
Check out these success stories.
 
I'll be starting a private accountability group for you so that you can experience this life-changing experience for yourself.  I'll save you spot, but you need to message me to be a part.

Phase 1 - Reclaim

It's the end of day four of the Reset and I can honestly say, I think I made it.  Yes, I realize this is 21 days, but given previous participant's feedback, days 3-4 are the hardest.  So does that mean I've passed the hurdle?  Hmmmm....not quite.

Difficulties and Obstacles
The most difficult adjustment for me has been no exercise.  Sweating is what makes me feel alive.  Having a great knock me down workout is what gives me the energy I need throughout the day.  So having to give that up is truly like taking away the blankey from the child.  It's hard for me to process that the rest is good.  As much as I want to 'bend' the rules just a bit, I know that if I truly trust this process, I will realize that the rest is what my body needs most.

The other difficult obstacle - hunger.  I am very used to eating very frequently and grazing throughout the day.  Having to give up the comfort of mid-morning oatmeal or my afternoon Chocolate Shakeology delight is tough. But as the days progress, I'm realizing the hunger is much more of a mental release than physical.  Eating out of habit rather than hunger is a hard thing to break.  Therefore, I'm trusting this process.

New Discoveries
I love to cook!  WHAT?  With very detailed grocery lists and a complete daily menu, what seemed like difficult meals in the past are actually quite simple and will forever become a staple on our rotation far beyond this Reset.  Never would I have ever thought I'd be making sushi with my husband.  AND like it!

I will no longer ever buy a dressing off the shelf after learning how to create the most fantastic blends from scratch.  The aroma alone is simply amazing.  Fruit has never tasted so fresh.  Food just tastes better when it is pretty and colorful, exactly what is intended for our bodies.

I'm a little embarrassed to admit, but other than leftovers, I have never packed my husband's lunch.  I'm doing that now.  There is something so traditional about preparing everything from scratch and packing it containers.  So much love goes into the process.  I'm focusing on the beauty of food and it is a true statement of my love to prepare this for him.  My thoughts about food were very differenet before the Reset.

I'm so proud of my husband for doing this with me.  It's not that much of a stretch for me to eat tempeh and seaweed and miso soup, but it's a giant leap for him and he's been such an awesome support.  I couldn't do this without him.  Amazing how food can bring about such an awareness and closeness.

Stay tuned....next week begins the Detox.   Intrigued to start your own Reset?  Join me!  Here's how!

Ready, Set, RESET!

I'm getting ready to do something I've never done.  I'm excited, anxious and really nervous.  I was skeptical to try this at first because it requires 21 days to really rest my body.  To me, this translates to weight gain, but after hearing testimony after testimony, I now know that this is EXACTLY what my body needs. 

Given my foot injury, I would say the timing couldn't be more perfect! In conjunction, I'll be starting Tai Cheng. Some people will choose not to exercise at all, but I feel this is a great opportunity to learn something I would have never tried.

So just what is the Ultimate Reset? 

Beachbody Ultimate Reset (BUR) is a complete, three-phase, 21-day program that provides everything you need to:

Phase 1: Reclaim your body's natural balance.

Phase 2: Release the harmful materials you may be storing within you.
Phase 3: Restore your system to its maximum health.

Why am I so nervous yet really excited?

I believe my anxiety has to do with the strict regimented process during the 21 days. I'll be focusing on a very natural, organic and vegan diet which I'm quite excited to try.  I'll admit, I'm not terribly excited about giving up turkey and chicken, but I've always wanted to take a more vegan approach to my diet and what a more perfect way than to really learn how to do it. 

I'm also really freaking about giving up caffeine, but I know my daily habit is becoming an addiction and it's time I faced the reality of it. The withdrawal headaches make me most nervous, thus I've already started to slowly wean myself to make the effects of Day 1-3 less dramatic.

I always do best when I'm very regimented in my approach to food and exercise.  I have the best results when I'm told exactly what to do with a simple guideline to follow.  This is what makes me most excited.  The BUR comes with detailed step-by-step instructions plus a 3-week eating plan with recipes, cooking tips, shopping lists, and more.  The work has been done.  I must simply be a student of the process!

 

In addition to the food guide, I'll be using six essential supplements that come with the package and are uniquely formulated to help restore your body to optimal health.

• Alkalinize – Helps maintain alkalinity.
• Oxygenize – Helps provide supplemental oxygen to the body.
• Mineralize – Adds natural minerals needed by the body.
• Detox – Helps remove toxins and waste in the colon.
• Revitalize – Helps revitalize flora in the digestive tract.
• Optimize – Promotes healthy metabolism and effective body functions.

Check out this video to see just how vital the BUR is to restoring a healthy balance in our bodies!

What the BUR is NOT:

• A starvation diet. I'll be eating real, filling and nutritious foods.  It's a chance to explore and discover new foods that I may have never tried.
• An abrupt cleanse that's hard on the body.  It's a gradual and natural approach.
• A laxative-based, colon blow. Self-explanatory!

Why accountability is SO important!

As is with any new exercise program, it's never easy to do it alone.  Accountability is not only vital but essential to going through this process.  I need support just as anyone would need help on a new journey to better health. 

As I followed a group through their recent journey, I began to really look forward to starting my own support group.  It was exciting to hear not only their incredible transformation numbers with weight loss, cholesterol, and blood pressure, but it was most exciting to witness the changes they had discovered in themselves.  Truly positive, energizing and rewarding changes. 

The more support I have, the easier this process is going to be.  I have more spots available to join me.  To learn more, find out what to expect during the Reset, and read Success Stories from test group participants, go to my Web site and click on the Beachbody Ultimate Reset banner.

Or contact me directly so that we can start this journey together!  Official date is April 30th!  This gives you enough time to get what you need to get started and get ready and get RESET!

Fireworks

Two years ago, I would have never written this blog post because I had no direction in my life.  I didn't realize that I created my own happiness and that no one but me could create my future.  I would have made excuses to not go on vacation and I would NEVER have posed in a bikini for the world to see.  I was unhappy, stuck and hoping that life would change, but too scared to take a risk to make a change.

Today I'm different.  I'm fearless, confident and in charge of my future.  I live for the quiet and peaceful moments with my family and I'm not afraid to step way outside of my comfort zone because it is there that change takes place.  I have passion and purpose and no longer worry about what people think of me because I love who I have become.  I simply love being a Beachbody coach!

My Beachbody Success Club trip was simply amazing and hard to put into words what the experience was like.  I do know that none of this would be possible if it weren't for the coaching opportunity Beachbody has given me.  Because I live to help and serve others, I'm fulfilling my own dreams.

During our week in Paradise Island, our days were spent on the beautiful, white sandy beach watching Jackson enjoy the waves hit his feet while he passed the time digging his little toes in the sand. Cedric and I relaxed in the sun.  It was so peaceful.  I wanted to stop the clock and not let the moments pass.  It was so genuinely special.

So happy in the sand!

Believe you can achieve whatever you want in life!

We had early morning wake up calls, but for good reason.  When do I get the opportunity to workout on the beach with the top trainers followed up by a Shakeology breakfast?  It was the perfectly written morning script for my life.

Morning yoga with Tony Horton

My awesome brother and I waiting to get a beat down by Shaun T's Insanity workout!

Bottomless supply of Shakeology!

Each evening we enjoyed fabulous dinners on the beach spent with great company while acting silly and sharing stories with the leaders of Beachbody!

Having a great chat with Beachbody CEO Carl Daikeler

 

An evening dinner by the dolphins...

...followed by a little plank challenge in the sand with my brother.

 

Each day I did things that I never dreamed I would do.  I stepped way outside my comfort zone by riding down a a gigantic water slide appropriately called the "Leap of Faith" and did a photo shoot in a bikini!  ME!   Fear no longer controls me. It drives me. 

I have made the best of friends in the last couple years.  The types of friends that uplift me, support me, challenge me and believe in me.  I am so grateful for my life and the gifts I've been given.

My Success Partner and I on the beach!

  

Getting to meet Tony Horton was a delight for my boys!

I had so many 'favorite' moments, but perhaps the most electric moment was the unexpected fireworks show on our last evening in Paradise.  It was an electric and emotional moment.  A culmination of the last year and a half of all the work I have put into being a coach.  It's work that makes a difference.  It's work that is not just changing my life, but so many other people I am fortunate to cross paths with every single day.

A Magical Moment

What it all comes down to is visualizing and then creating the life that you want and deserve.  I love to help people and I love to lead others to an overall better quality of life by giving them the tools to live a more healthy lifestyle.  I've been incredibly fortunate and wonderfully blessed in my life to have the most handsome and supportive husband along with two sweet boys.  Jackson already has plans for our trip next year to Disney World and has made sure that big brother Keelan will join us next time!

Would you love to share this experience with me next year?  Ask me how.

Making Visualization a Reality

When I was in college, I needed a car.  I remember my Dad taking me to a used car dealership.  I'm sure it was filled with Fords, Chevys, Pontiacs, etc.  Tediously searching row by row, I saw reliable college cars, but nothing sparked my eye like that old, yet shiny red, 1987 Audi 4000s.  She was a beauty and I just knew she would be mine.

My dad strongly suggested other cars, but my mind was made up before we left the lot "to think about it".  I had to have THAT car.  Everything about her made me feel happy.  I knew a little sweet talking and number crunching was in order with my dad that night.  He didn't disappoint.  He never does.

After landing a sweet deal even my frugal father couldn't pass up, he helped me drive it off the lot the next day.  I never felt so happy to drive a car as I did this Audi.  Black leather seats, HEATED (perfect for Minnesota winters, where I attended college) and best of all, a sunroof!  I felt like a queen in this car!

I drove her for four memorable years and then we reluctantly parted ways in 1997 when I moved to Texas.  Since then, I've ALWAYS had the dream to drive another German car.  Maybe it is the German in my blood, but something about the way these cars are made and aesthetically look make me feel joy, comfort and happiness.

I'd settled for a Volkswagen...twice. That was economically the right choice for me at the time.  First a Jetta, then a Passat.  Good cars, but they didn't make me feel the way the Audi did.   So I started dreaming.  If that 1987 Audi made me feel like that, what would a BMW would feel like? GULP!

Remember last week when I talked about how to clearly visualize your future? You didn't think I'd stop with visualizing now did you? That's just beginning. The tough part is action. The fun part is making your vision a reality.

For the last 15 years, I cannot tell you how many times I visualized in my head how great it would be to own a Black BMW.  That same Audi feeling came over me every time I would see one.  I had several moments like the one below.  My conscious mind was visualizing that car and it kept showing up, teasing me, suggesting that I needed to get to work.  I needed to put my visualization into action.

This was a particular fun moment I couldn't resist capturing!

 

 

So I made a dream board (or vision board) about a year ago and decided to really put the thought of owning a Black BMW into my conscious mind!  I didn't know how I'd do it.  But I knew, that I would do it.  I didn't just dream anymore.  I got busy.

 

Every day...relentless.  Some days its a grind.  But if I want the things I have visualized for my future, I must put forth great effort.  I must align my values with my dreams and I must have genuine intentions for the things that I want to achieve. 

So when I got the call from the VW Dealership on Friday that the repairs on my current Passat would cost more than the car is worth, I got a little nervous.  You see, the deadline I had given for myself to achieve my BMW goal was June 2012.  Was I ready to make the plunge this soon?  Should I be achieving my goals early? Should I just be safe and get that Ford, Chevy or Pontiac or should I get what I have visualized for myself and what I have worked so hard for over the past year.

What do you think?  I'm ready for the car that parallels my life right now.  I'm not ready to purchase a Brand New Black BMW.  I never made that distinction.  But I am ready for a Used Black BMW.

So do you think that because of the vision I created, that it surprised me that the first two cars that became available on my internet search were Used Black BMWs?  Do you think I'm surprised when I test drove the car, I experienced that same exact feeling my old Audi had given back in college.  Do you think I'm surprised that the price was just right for where I am in my life today?

 

Visualize.  Work.  Achieve.

The keys to my 2007 Black BMW 328i

Visualizing 2012

It's been some time since I've posted here.  This Mama has been incredibly Motivated in other areas of my life.  However, with the start of a new year and a fresh perspective, I felt it necessary to script out my year at a glance.

I recently sat down and wrote a letter to myself, entitled, My 2012 Visualization.  You can call it an action plan, a road map, a strategy if you will.  For me, it's a conscious call to action. 

There is something very empowering and incredibly therapeutic about visualizing my future.  With this concept in mind, it's hard not to strive to reach these goals.  It's almost as if this signals a trigger of response in my brain, calls in a production team to figure out the plan, and then implements that plan in detailed and organized fashion.

A lot of people avoid goal-setting because of the fear of failure.  What if I don't achieve this and what if this doesn't happen exactly as I planned?  This is not my prophecy, this is my positive visualization.  I choose to set myself up for success rather than be fearful of unknown failures.

I've often heard that many athletes use this visualization technique before a big game or before a major race.  It is something that translates quite well for me as a marathon runner.  I never line up at the start line and tell myself, "I sure hope I finish today."  Rather, I see myself doing something crazy like this at the finish, and that motivates me to have a successful race.

Visualization allows me to dig deep into my soul and create the life that I want.  Rather than strumming through life and waiting for events to happen, I've chosen to design the life that my family and I deserve.

Have you ever said, "When I finish paying this off, then I'll be able to save more money."  Or "When my life settles down, then I can start to exercise."  Or my favorite, "Once I have more time, I'll be able to prepare better meals so that I can be healthier."

Why not try this visualization exercise?  It took me less than an hour to design 2012 in a positive and fulfilling perspective.  Some things left a giant ball in my stomach.  I scared myself a little.  Should I really dream this big?  The answer is inevitably, "YES!"

It's easy to avoid setting goals because when your life doesn't change, you have, in your mind, not failed.  But which if, you just changed your thought process a little and rather than being fearful of failure, being prepared for success?

February 1st is just around the corner and I'm looking for five people to step up to my exercise and nutrition challenge!  Do you visualize a healthier you in 2012?  This is how you get started.  Ask me how today!



Do You Want To Be A Better Runner?

Sometimes I take for granted my ability to run.  I just assume that everyone will enjoy it and have the freedom to do what I do.  Running is a gift and I am incredibly humbled and aware that it's not something I should take lightly. 

When I started running, it was a huge accomplishment to run for 30 continuous minutes.  It was a gradual process of adding minutes daily and having the mental wherewithal to realize my ability was far greater than I had given myself credit.

Today, I can happily pronounce that I've logged many, many miles over the past 10 years, but what I'm most proud about is that my journey never ends with a race.  I'm always planning the next, before I finish the last.  I envision my future races to be better, faster and more memorable.

Crossing the finish line is an awesome accomplishment and it's often THE goal when I talk to other runners.  "I just want to finish." It doesn't matter if it's pretty or fast.  What matters is what happens in the end.  Two arms raised at the finish line.

But what about those of us that have that burning drive to be better?  Those of us who don't just want to finish but rather want to finish strong and fast and dare I say....competitively.  I would have never considered myself a fast runner.  Average at best.  But something inside of me kept whispering that I was better.  I was fast.  I was a Boston Qualifier. 

Are you that person?  Do you long to qualify for Boston, but you just haven't been able to get faster?  Do you just want to be in the higher and faster echelon of runners?  Do you secretly want to not just finish a race, but actually race it.  I'm not talking elite here.  I'm talking top 20 - 25 percent.

My life and running career changed when I was introduced to high intensity cross-training and optimal nutrition.  I went from average to speedy (for me) in a matter of months.  I dropped unnecessary weight, leaned out my body fat ratio and accomplished some pretty cool race feats, including qualifying for Boston, which I never thought possible.

That's me over the course of 60 and 120 days.  I've been a runner and I will continue to be a runner.  It just took stepping up my game and focusing on nutrition that I became a better runner. 

I'm looking for five people who have that same desire as I did to join a 60-day Insanity / Shakeology challenge with me.  If you believe it, you can achieve it.  Let me help you go get it.  You'll get my daily support, motivation and advice!

Who is ready to be better, stronger, faster?  I can show you how.

The day I accomplished what I had only dreamed about in the past.  Getting ready to cross the finish line in qualifying fashion.  I believed in me and I worked really hard.  I believe in you and you CAN do this too.  Ask me how!

How Broccoli Slaw Changed My Life!

If you were to ask me two years ago if I'd be working from home, doing what I love and feeling complete happiness today, I would have probably rolled my eyes and made some kind of cynical remark.  I didn't dream big and I didn't know how to create my future.

Then unexpectedly, the most unimaginable thing stepped in and changed my life.  It made me smile more, laugh more, live life more to its fullest.  Thanks broccoli slaw for changing my life.

How can a little sliver of green goodness cause such a stir you ask?  It forced me to do the things I always wanted to do.  You see, I am a huge teeth person.  If I meet you, I notice your teeth.  That's just how I am.  I love a pearly white set of teeth. I love to see a beaming smile.  It's really not about your teeth at all, it's about what I wanted for myself.

When I looked in the mirror, I didn't like what I saw.  I wanted to have a beaming white 'grill'.  There were ways to get it, but I could never invest in myself in that way.  I couldn't justify it.  Then, one night, broccoli slaw intervened.  A single bite and I heard something pop.  Reluctant and hesitant, I made my way to the mirror to experience the horror I had felt.  I chipped my front tooth and I had a wide gap in the middle of my front teeth!

I had no choice other than to get it fixed.  A visit to the dentist over the course of the next two months and I had a beautiful set of pearly whites that I had always dreamed to have.  Instead of compromising my smile the way I had learned to in the past several years, I took advantage of every situation to grin and beam.

I became more confident and I wanted to smile all the time.  I invested in myself more so I could smile more.  I looked for opportunities to smile for the camera, rather than just show a toothless grin. 

I began to take chances, pursue my passion, serve others, make a difference.  I took every opportunity to get out of my comfort zone and smile while I did just that.

When life intervenes, you can either view it as a setback or as a temporary hiatus to greater things.  There is a ALWAYS a message to learn in life every life situation.  The beauty is looking back at your journey and being able to pay that message forward.

My message?  No, it's not 'eat more broccoli'.  Although I think that's important too.  Don't put off things that you have always wanted to do.  Don't wait for someday.  Someday does not exist.  Do today what is going to make tomorrow great.  Smile more.  Live more.

I Did It!

Time to check off another mark on my bucket list.  Chicago Marathon  - Check!

The greatest thing about running a marathon is that no matter how well trained you think you may be, you just never what will happen on race day.  Anything and everything can happen.  So when you have a good day, you just have sit back and give thanks to the marathon gods, the support of family and friends and for the ability to put one foot in front of the other.  It truly is a gift!

Running a marathon in a different city always has its challenges. But, at the same time, it's exciting to travel to places, explore new cities and run in places I'd never get the opportunity to otherwise. 

Thanks to my wonderful friend Jill and her awesome pre-planning, we stayed at hotel so close the start line, we could actually see the port-a-potties from our room.  (A HUGE bonus for a runner!)

After a long day of Planes, Trains and Automobiles...and Shuttle Buses, I called it a VERY early night.  Unlike any other marathon I've ever run, I slept like a baby the night before the race!

Up and at 'em by 4:00 a.m.!  I was excited! I could feel the energy in the air and once my race gear was on, I knew the day was going to be great!!

Jill and I working out our pre-race jitters in the hotel lobby!  A highly coordinated race outfit is essential!!

Ready!  Set!  Race!!  At 15 feet into the race, I realized I had committed the ultimate race mistake.  I messed up my Garmin and accidentally removed PACE.  I contemplated trying to reset it while I ran, but I knew it would cause me to lose valuable time and mental energy.  I decided to let it go and just run.  This probably was the best mistake I made all day.  I didn't focus on my watch.  I just ran how I felt.  The air was warm, but I was feeling good, so I decided to just go for it.

 I don't remember much about the course at all. I remember seeing Elvis, China town, some random poop, a lot of fans, some really funny and motivational signs and a lot of different shoe styles. I focused on the race. I'd save the sightseeing for the next day.

My goal was 3:40.  With the heat, I made the decision to get water AND Gatorade at each stop, which slowed my pace slightly the second half.  Overall, I lost five minutes, but keeping well hydrated was more important to me.  Finish time - 3:45!  I'll take it!

 
This is what a rockstar feels like! All the spectators barricaded behind a fence!

I took a LONG time to get from the finish line to the post-race party.  I iced, napped, changed, had a less than awesome massage and read all my text messages of congratulations.  Having beer after a race has never been appealing to me.  I just enjoyed the energy of the masses at Millennium Park.

I met these fantastic friends on the plane from Dallas!  We got together that night for dinner and to share our warrior stories and bottle of wine!

What is a marathon without a little swag?  I was knocking at the doors of Niketown on Michigan Ave. at 8:00 a.m.!

And of course, a visit to the Bean!

Chicago did not disappoint! I love the city for its clean streets, unique restaurants, beautiful architecture and it's extremely organized marathon! From the moment I arrived, I knew the weekend would be special!

Marathon number five is in the books!  Next - Boston!

How Insanity Made Me a Better Runner!

One of the questions I'm most often asked is, "How do you incorporate your Beachbody programs into your running schedule?"

My answer is based on your fitness goals.  Are you training for a marathon or are you more interested in shorter training runs?  Are you running to become fit or are you trying to become a more fit runner? 

When I'm training for a marathon, my focus is running four to five days a week with one or days focused solely on cross-training.  When my goal is geared more toward fitness, I flip this schedule.  I have six days of cross-training fitness with one or two days a week devoted to shorter runs to maintain my base of running.

In simplest terms, a weekly schedule would look like this.

This schedule works for me.  It allows me to focus on my main objective (i.e. a marathon) without completely losing the fitness I've developed from Insanity, The Asylum or any other Beachbody program.

I believe that it is so important to always incorporate some level of cross-training into your weekly schedule for injury prevention, to develop strength and a strong core and to keep your routine fresh.

Since I have really made this a part of my overall fitness, whether the majority of my time is spent running or cross-training, I have become a much more efficient athlete.  In May of 2010, I ran a lot and spent time in a gym, but I wasn't efficiently working the way my body needed to be.

By incorporating Beachbody programs into my routine, I've learned how to work more efficiently and eat more effectively.  The programs allowed me to lose 4 percent body fat and by becoming leaner, I've become a better runner.  Last year, I took 16 minutes off of my previous marathon time and qualified for the Boston Marathon.

If I can do this. Anyone can! Trust me!

Letting Go...

When he was five, I remember taking off the training wheels and holding the seat because I did not want him to fall. Today I dropped him off at college, took off the training wheels on the bike of life. I got up enough courage to let go. It was a happy/sad day.

I borrowed that from my husband. I thought it was so indicative of how I was feeling.  Yesterday our son officially left for college.  I wasn't sure how this would affect me.  What emotions would I have?  How will our house adjust without his intermittent presence?

One thing that drew me to my husband when we met nearly 13 years ago was the fact that he was a single dad.  I had never met and certainly never dated a single dad before, but to see the relationship between father and his 5-year old son was a sign of not just a good man, but one of very high character. 

Entering into that relationship may have caused some disruption into their 'man' code way of life, but they invitingly welcomed me into their lives and I quickly became a 'mother' following the parental lead of my future husband, gaining guidance and wisdom along the way.

We say it so often, but life truly does pass by so quickly and though there were so many cherishable moments in the past 13 years in raising my son as my own, I can't help but wish I could have done more, been more, given more. 

I felt a bit numb up until yesterday's farewell day.  My emotions tend to well inside until a very significant moment opens the spigot to my heart.  It wasn't me that led the good-byes.  It was my son.  Using this opportunity as some sort of grandiose teachable moment, all I could do was to tell him how much I loved him and how proud of him I was for always accepting me into his life.

I told him to set his priorities and goals and make good choices, but above all, find what makes him happy.

And then he did what I never expected.  He thanked me for being the only mother he's ever had and told me how proud he was of me for following my heart and pursuing what makes me happy.  Just when you think you haven't done quite enough, your kids make it very clear that love and guidance is all they ever really need.

I'm so proud of him.  I can't wait for his dirty laundry and his infrequent visits.  I look forward to the next chapter in our lives as our bond continues to grow into his adult years.